Boundaries: Where Necessary

Boundary: a line that marks a limit.

Having real boundaries set, were not a real thing to me until I had a child. There were boundaries that I had subconsciously set, based on my moral compass, and time.  However, having a child made me really think about things that I could no longer allow or participate in, to ensure I was spending my time and energy where it was most important, with my child.

As I begin to grow in motherhood and as an entrepreneur, I began to set more and more boundaries. Boundaries were necessary in order for me to be to be organized, to have peace, and ultimately to be successful.  I was, initially, very reactive in setting boundaries, setting them only after a point of frustration.  Then I realized the benefit of proactively setting them to avoid frustration, confusion, and wasted time.  I also learned that when setting boundaries, I had to eliminate emotional inhibitions.  I couldn’t be concerned with how people would feel (if my heart was in the right place) and I had to focus on what was best for my child and my personal success.

Boundaries can be set in any area you deem necessary.  As a parent and someone who maybe pursuing entrepreneurship, especially those still working corporate job, boundaries may be necessary in the following areas:

• Time – Setting blocks of time for daily and/or weekly task.  This is necessary to avoid distraction and to ensure you are as productive as you need to be.
• Relationships  – Eliminate relationships that are toxic, confusing, and misleading.  Relationships can be a huge distraction if they are not genuine and backed by good intentions.  Relationships come with expectations of others, and just as you must manage time, you must manage the exceptions placed on you by the people in your life.
• Commitments – It is EXTREMELY hard to attend every event your invited to.  Take it from me.  I rarely have free weekends, and I am still learning how to gently decline, in order to make time for the things I have to get done.  No is a complete sentence.
• Self-Care – You have to make time to take care of yourself.  Letting things outside of you completely consume you, is a quick and easy way to become overwhelmed and uninspired.  Plan self-care, which could involve a facial, a staycation, or time to just be alone and enjoy a glass a wine.  The goal here is to make time to unwind and recharge.
• Space  – Working from home, or an office, can be distracting.  Spacial boundaries would include keeping a clean workspace, and if possible, changing your workspace to a different location at least once a week to maintain focus.

Setting boundaries does not mean that you have to completely desert yourself from life!  Also setting boundaries can be very healthy for relationship with yourself and others!  They help you focus on what you want, and really allows you to get rid of wastes.  Start small with boundary setting, and adjust as necessary!  Good luck!