Who Runs the World? Serena!

Intended to be a celebration of a 24th Grand Slam title, and a much-publicized comeback after the birth of her daughter, Serena Williams dominated the US Open final.  This time she did not leave with the Championship title, but she did something much bigger! Serena took a stand against sexism, after being wrongfully accused of a coaching violation.

I watched the video as Serena was nearly brought to tears, defending herself  and claiming, “Every time I play here, I have problems!” Serena went back and forth with the umpire, telling him that he owed her an apology and that she’d never cheat! She further went on to talk about how men had done much worse (than call the umpire a thief) and were not penalized at all.  She didn’t back down, even after the referee didn’t agree with her, she stood her ground against what she believed was right, saying “I don’t cheat to win, I’d rather lose.” Overshadowing the win of 20 year-old Naomi Osaka, Serena did what many women are often afraid to do – take a stand!

I was moved emotionally because it made me think a lot about being a woman, a black woman, and how are emotions are so often misconstrued.  It also brought to the forefront, the double standard where women who are emotional are viewed as weak, or uncontrolled, but an emotional man is considered outspoken and his actions are often overlooked.  Why is this? In an earlier blog, I discussed my experiences with how expressing oneself as black woman is viewed in the workplace.

Finally, I was most moved by Serena explaining to the umpire that she would never cheat, as she had a daughter!  It made me ask myself if and how I take a stand for my child.  How do I as a mother, stand up in a way that gives light to integrity and great character overall? Surely, it’s not by teaching her that she can’t be emotional, nor is it showing her that winning is worth her integrity. As moms, our actions are worth some extra thought and consideration. Not only must we uphold ourselves to be full of integrity, but we must teach out children that character comes before competition.

 

In the book, “The Conscious Parent”, one point Dr. Shelfali Tsabary makes is that we often think of parenthood as a hierarchical role, where we are above our children, because we created them.  He further stresses, that once we lose the idea that we are above our children, it is then that we understand that parenthood is the opportunity to learn from our children as they learn from us.  We are given the opportunity to be better based on what we learn from role as a parent, and the child is made better from what we teach them.

In Serena’s case, her acknowledgement of how her behavior could impact her daughter made me further understand, good or bad, my behavior is not justifiable with the thought that “I’m grown”, or just because I’m the parent. Instead, how I behave should and will be a direct reflection of the character and qualities I instill in my child, because rather I like it not, she’s learning from me.

The Benefit of Doubt

…doubt has a way of creeping in when we are dabbling outside of our comfort zone.

woman looking at the window

The word doubt has such a negative connotation and is often associated with fear, failure, and barriers to success. Doubt sends us through a series of scenarios of why somethings just won’t work. However, once we program our minds to understand that doubt is apart of “the process”,  I believe we will take more chances, and execute on the things that we always dream of doing! We doubt ourselves often, in fear of what could go wrong or our abilities to create the things we want.

Prior to starting Corporate Momming, I had been toying with an idea of writing a book.  I was in the process of leaving my corporate job, and I was subconsciously angry with the things I’d dealt with. As time passed, and I began to get comfortable in my new normal, my energy shifted to balancing motherhood and running a business. Truly it’s something I’ve been learning for the last three years. So without having truly “mastered’ this balance thing, I began to doubt myself and think of all the reasons Corporate Momming couldn’t work. I’m a single mom, I’m not married, I won’t be able to relate to moms working 9-5’s, all things I told myself when creating the blog. Doubt. I did it anyway.

Doubt sends us through a series of scenarios of why somethings just won’t work.

Fast forward, and the blog is up and running.  Every other week, I ask myself where I see it going, and if it’s something I’ll be able to keep up with. Not because I don’t want to; however, doubt has a way of creeping in when we are dabbling outside of our comfort zone. So I accept that doubt comes, but it is my goal to be bigger than doubt and to continue to create and design things in my life, as I desire.

people in a meeting

Just as doubt comes, God (or the Universe…but I’m going with God) sends reminders of why you should continue to move forward. One thing that I always tell myself, when faced with doubt is I love God, and He’s never going to play me, and everything will work out for my good. It’s really an easy fix and a way to eliminate worry, fast.  I just pray for direction and start the work.

Bake Your Own Cake!

“…despite having a child, I still had goals and a deep desire to be great at whatever I chose to do.”
After a breakup that seemed much like a divorce, I was completely distraught. Maybe I watched too many movies  or read too many love stories, but nothing about starting a family was a fairy tale for me. I was left with a mortgage, a baby and 4 bathrooms with little energy to clean them. I always wondering how families failed to keep things together for the kids, but the relationship just no longer worked. I was completely embarrassed that my family failed and it weighed on me deeply.

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It had become emotionally and mentally draining and I no longer had the strength to fight.
Between balancing my career, motherhood, love and trying find myself – I was exhausted. My desire to outwork everyone and climb the corporate ladder had became a blur. My life was filled with work. Corporate America without children is hard enough and all I could think about was my baby and sleep.
I guess without having an open conversation about it – I figured I would take some time off to get myself together. I did not help with many of the bills. I actually only paid my car note and what I could. I read a lot of books and it said most wealthy families allowed the wife to stay home and raise the kids, so I figured we were good.
But, I was no wife.

Continue reading “Bake Your Own Cake!”

Boss Babe vs. Boss Baby

I run into women launching new businesses, and looking to advance in their careers all the time, and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard, “I can’t imagine how do you do all this, with a baby (or small child)?”. In my mind, my answer is always, “I’m actually better at it, because I have a child.” I am more organized and focused than I’ve ever been.

There is a stereotype of some sort that makes career-oriented women incompatible with being a mother.  Meanwhile, no one is questioning how men with children are able to remain committed to their work. We don’t always discuss or admit, that being a working mom is much different from being a man.  It comes with its own set of challenges (and rewards). At no point, is it easy to try to being a boss mom.  You know how the saying goes, to whom much is given, much more is required!

Continue reading “Boss Babe vs. Boss Baby”

Tools: Planning Made Easy

Hi New Friends!

I started Corporate Momming, June 19, 2018.  I was sitting in training, and my mind drifted off into space.  During this time, I came up with a name and immediately began to execute on the project.  Initially I wanted to wait to get a fancy/elaborate website, and  a ton of planning, but instead, I started with what I had.

I created a planning tool, that would assist moms in planning out their week, with considerations for home life, and personal life. I believe that moms should consider their mental health as important as their family’s, because you can’t pour into others, if your cup is empty.  I initially made this available for those that followed the blog.

Today, I am releasing an updated version, (shout out to my best friend/sister, Celeste, for her help!)and sharing to all readers, free of charge.  The planner can be downloaded, by using the following link:  Corporate Momming_ Weekly Planning Tool.

Thank you for joining the Corporate Momming community, and I hope that I have and can continue to add value to your journey!

Blessings,

Robyn